strawberry cake

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Posts by strawberry cake

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  51

  What Were Your Consequences For Leaving The "Truth"???

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  was it as bad as everyone says, that if you leave the organization, you'll go back to the world, get into trouble and suffer?.

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  strawberry cake

  I got shunned by most of my 'friends.' The elders tried to get my sons to shun me, but it didn't work. 2 no longer go and 1 is only going to hold on to friends. He also has non- JW friends.

  I got shunned at the school where I work by an ex pioneer partner. Interestingly she had'new light' and started to talk to me after the Head Teacher gave her a warning, (as I threatened to sue her for religious discrimination.) I was quite surprised when she walked up to me and sat down. She accused me of trying to initiate conversation with her. I said, no, I was just saying goodmorning. I explained that the brainwashing was interpretting my goodmorning as a wicked apostate trick to take her from Jehovah. I told her that I am not under the WT any more so will not be shuffling around with my head down. She started wining on about how hard this all was for HER!

  She hadn't spoken to me for about a year. Point blank, refusing to say goodmorning or to respond to my greetings. She would actually greet the person sitting next to me and ignore me. She was absolutely bare faced. Now she's back peddling, desparate to prove to staff at work that she is not a religious biggot. She hadn't realized that I had told everyone at work what she was doing.

  I also reported a JW supply teacher who came once a week to teach. I knew her and said hi but she totally blanked me. The Head Teacher decided not to ask her back.

  I may get shunned outside, but I won't tolerate it at my place of work.

  SC
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  8

  Zoned out ' friends.'

  by strawberry cake in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  this is a note i got from an old 'friend' when i contacted her on facebook.

  she was one of my closest jw 'friends' who shunned me, yet would greet me if she saw me in town or at an event.

  i thought she had some independent thought: i was wrong.

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  strawberry cake

  Thanks Ninja, nj, RI, Maybe I missed an opportunity. I sense that when I try to explain, her apostate alarm goes off and she doesn't hear me. I am baffled that she hasn't wised up and therfore may be using the structure to cope with life.

  We did explain our view to her, as she was the first person my husband and I told when we had made our decision to leave. We explained everything and told her to check the internet and investigate what we had told her.

  Even with all this, she decided to stay. Ironically, she wasn't even that strong a JW, always complaining about not being able to do enough and torn between her love for teaching and the demands made on her by the Org. She ignored a lot of the societies adivice when it suited her. On my leaving she actually become a stronger witness.

  Oompa, it does indeed seem like a waste of time trying.

  Wobble, I have tried explaining to many, when we were leaving, yet they are still going! She knows how strongly I feel and indeed why. It seems that her trust in the Org is similar to a trust in the bible, a leap of faith.

  SC

  Lurk3r, Yes I did kinda make her part of my family for years. We went on holidays and her children are close to my children. I find the finality of the shunning hard to understand. I thought we were so connected as friends and that she would see beyond the JW rules. And of course I think that she is wasting her life on this and want to save her.
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  8

  Zoned out ' friends.'

  by strawberry cake in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  this is a note i got from an old 'friend' when i contacted her on facebook.

  she was one of my closest jw 'friends' who shunned me, yet would greet me if she saw me in town or at an event.

  i thought she had some independent thought: i was wrong.

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  strawberry cake

  This is a note I got from an old 'friend' when I contacted her on facebook. She was one of my closest JW 'friends' who shunned me, yet would greet me if she saw me in town or at an event. I thought she had some independent thought: I was wrong. I hope one day she'll wake up.

  I am sincerely sorry for your pain. All people believe what they think to be true. You and I know what each other believe and the reasons why we act the way we do. You are the same J that I grew to love as a dear friend and will always remain that way but now your view has changed and so we cannot associate as worshippers together and share spiritual things. I am here the same as before but we can only be reunited in a shared understanding of scripture. I pray that that day will come and we will find each other again.
  Love M

  SC
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  40

  Describe The Jehovah's Witness Community

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  in your experience, are witnesses all about love?.

  is the brotherhood really what it is said to be?.

  did you feel the love from "the friends"?.

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  strawberry cake

  Deluded!
  
  xxx SC
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  31

  How about a list of "loaded" words used by the JW's?

  by cawshun in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  apostate.

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  strawberry cake

  Mother.
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  37

  How bad IS this religion on a relationship??

  by -Tank in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  see below post, edited for paragraphs.

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  strawberry cake

  Her love will always be conditional. Is this the sort of love you want?
  
  Also the organization will ALWAYS come between you, spoiling your relationship and she may be disappointed in you for not committing.
  
  xxx SC
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  17

  Raising children as JW's

  by lancelink in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  tonight my wife and i attended a christmas play held at a local church.

  it was really cute, 4-8 year olds recreating the whole christ story, when suddenly this totally empty feeling hit me like a punch to the face.

  i realized how much we missed out with our own two kids by raising them as jws.

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  strawberry cake

  I look back on how I raised my 3 sons with some relief. Even thought I pioneered and was quite a zealous JW. I always made sure they had lots of fun.
  
  We camped a lot and went out on day trips almost weekly. We made our family study fun, by keeping it to half an hour and always playing a board game or having a special treat to eat after.
  Saturday ministry, also under an hour, we would ALWAYS end up at our favorite cafe for a panini, danish and hot chocolate.
  
  My kids had Parties,sleep overs and take-out nights with friends,also puppet shows.
  The last thing we did (secretly saying goodbye to them all)was to have man come to our house and do a reptile/insect party for all the kids in the congregation.
  
  all in all,ironically, because of our hard work, our kids have a very close network of JW mates, who they would find hard to lose and some happy memories.
  
  The one thing I couldn't do, was to make those mind numbing meetings more interesting for them.During the meeting, my two younger sons would chew and peel their finger nails till they were dripping with blood! Also my middle son started to build up a real resentment of me...for being so full on as a pioneer.(strangely enough, resentment for leaving also) Lately, however,(I think, because I am not setting his theocratic goals and he is free to be himself now,) I feel he is actually starting to let me off the hook.
  
  This year they had their first Christmas, my eldest is still going to the meetings, but we still enjoyed a special day, with a large roast dinner and all the trimmings. (Last night he went to his first new years eve party with non JW old school friends. He said he had lots of fun.) We all sat together after dinner to watch Christmas telly. It was great! My youngest especially loved it. Next year there is no stopping us! Christmas tree,presents,decorations the lot!
  
  xxx SC
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  39

  How Long Were You Mentally Out Of The "Truth" Before You Left?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was totally spiritually and mentally out of it at least 2 years before i resigned as an elder.

  it was actually a long process but i can say it is a complete one.

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  strawberry cake

  As soon as the most recent generation change was published I was out, mentally...I knew that their doctrine was running out of time and I was waiting for their explanation..When it came, I knew they were fakes. I started researching, contemplated fading, couldn't stomach it, so instead,told my children, let the elders know, gave up all my studies and said goodbye( with the wonderful support and advice from this forum) In all,I was out and disassociated in about 6 months.
  
  xxx SC
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  31

  How did you feel the 1st time you visited this or other "apostate" site?

  by Newborn in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i thought jehobar would struck me dead with a lightning right on the spot.

  seriously, i was so scared.

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  strawberry cake

  I felt confused as to why I had not looked before. I realized that I had been played by the organization and decided that I would never allow anyone/or organization to manipulate me like that again. I became totally obsessed with the forums(my eyes were sore from staring at the screen!) and ordered many books to fill me in on just how much I had been lied to. I also felt relief, as the JW life style was a never ending burden, and so many things were not adding up recently, and now I had found out why... It was all a sham.
  xxx SC
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  45

  What Are Your New Year's Resolutions?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  mine is to better organize my stuff and throw sh*t away.

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  strawberry cake

  To have fun!
  xxx SC